The Narcissism of Sin

July 22, 2024 Pastor Chris Oswald
Thesis True repentance from sin requires recognizing that all sin is narcissistic self-exaltation that harms others, and it demands genuine humility before God, who stands as the avenger of those we've hurt but who, unlike us, responds to our brokenness not with cruelty but with compassionate restoration.
Series
Repentance in Exodus
Type
Topical
Tone
Method
What's in this sermon

The shape of the argument

63 units across exposition, application, illustration, theological claim, and conclusion. The pastor's argument is built from these moving parts.

Pastoral correction · unit #11
"Direct pastoral address asserting the value and urgency of the teaching being delivered, encouraging repeated listening and claiming this message could be life-changing for those who receive it."
Doctrinal loci· 13 surfaced
Theology Proper · 18 Sanctification · 15 Hamartiology · 14 Soteriology · 13 Ethics / Moral Theology · 9 Christology · 5 Eschatology · 3 Pneumatology · 3 Providence / Sovereignty · 2 Anthropology · 1 Bibliology · 1 Covenant Theology · 1 Ecclesiology · 1
Bible citations· 33
Exodus 9:17 | Jeremiah 50 (pile of grain reference) | Psalm 68:4 | Job (siege works reference) | Proverbs 4:8 | Matthew 25:31-40 | Psalm 68 (God with the fatherless) | Psalm 34:18 | Isaiah 19:20 | Deuteronomy 10:18 | Genesis 12 (Abrahamic covenant) | Galatians 5:19-21 | Ephesians 2 (enslaved to passions) | 1 John 3:14 | 1 Peter 3:7 | Isaiah 1:11-17 | Amos 5:21-24 | 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8 | Hebrews 12:14-17 | Isaiah 55:6-7 | Isaiah 55:5-6 | Isaiah 55:8-9 | Luke 18:10-14 | Isaiah 55:10-13 | Malachi 4:1-3 | Micah 6:8 | Isaiah 55:1-2 | Revelation 3:20 | Hebrews 12:18-24 | Psalm 51 (broken and contrite heart)
Illustrations· 7
  1. cultural reference · unit #16 — Classical quotation illustrating the psychological principle that positive desire motivates more powerfully than fear.
  2. cultural reference · unit #17 — Theological reference to Thomas Chalmers's concept that new loves expel old ones, supporting the claim that positive motivation (love) is more powerful than negative motivation (fear).
  3. historical example · unit #34 — Brief allusion to the prodigal son parable illustrating God's compassionate response to true repentance—he doesn't exploit the repentant sinner's lowness but celebrates restoration.
  4. hypothetical · unit #38 — Hypothetical scenario extending Jesus's parable—imagining what would happen if the Pharisee returned to the temple with genuine humility and prayed the tax collector's prayer. The point: God would immediately hear him.
  5. hypothetical · unit #39 — Continues the hypothetical Pharisee scenario to illustrate why cruel people fear repentance—they project their own cruelty onto others and fear being exploited in their vulnerability, just as they've exploited others.
  6. hypothetical · unit #55 — Extends the Zacchaeus example into a hypothetical eschatological courtroom scene where Zacchaeus testifies against Pharaoh, the rich young ruler, and those who refused Christ after seeing Lazarus raised, creating urgency through the prospect of being condemned by Zacchaeus's positive example.
  7. historical example · unit #61 — Transitions into concluding prayer via David's testimony in Psalm 51 (God does not despise a broken heart) and David Livingston's testimony (no sacrifice for Christ is truly a sacrifice given what you gain), framing repentance as ultimately joyful exchange rather than loss.
Theological claims· 27
  1. False repentance is fundamentally rooted in false humility, while true repentance is rooted in true humility. unit #2
  2. All sin hurts other people because all sin is fundamentally self-exaltation—the narcissistic elevation of self over others. unit #7
  3. One key to overcoming sin is recognizing that all sin—even seemingly benign sins like hoarding wealth—is narcissistic self-exaltation at someone else's expense. unit #12
  4. Understanding that sin is the exaltation of self over others is key to true repentance. unit #13
  5. Love is a more powerful force for repentance than fear—once a Christian sees that their sin hurts people they're called to love, the love of Christ within them can overcome what fear alone cannot. unit #14
  6. Many Christians remain in habitual sin not because they lack the Holy Spirit's love but because they haven't recognized that their supposedly private sins have victims—people who need them at their best. unit #18
  7. Recognizing that our sins hurt others increases the fear of the Lord because it forces us to reckon with the possibility that God will take their side and stand in opposition to us, as he did with Pharaoh. unit #19
  8. Until people stop sinning against those they're supposed to love, God wants nothing to do with their worship, no matter how extensive or fervent. unit #23
  9. The fear of the Lord means recognizing that God will avenge those you're hurting, refuse to hear your prayers, and stand against you if you continue sinning against people he's called you to love. unit #25
  10. The principle that God is an avenger applies universally across all sin that hurts people—whether sexual sin (1 Thessalonians), oppression (Isaiah/Amos), or enslavement (Pharaoh). unit #26
  11. The pride that can kill you spiritually is not intellectual denial of sin but fear of humiliation—being so afraid of the vulnerability of true humility that you delay repentance until the opportunity expires. unit #29
  12. Persisting in sin despite knowing it hurts others is not inferiority but pride—you've created a world where your desires get special preference and the rules that apply to everyone else don't apply to you. unit #30
  13. True repentance requires descending from the elevated position you've built, becoming lower than those you've hurt, and remaining there as long as necessary for repentance to complete its work. unit #31
  14. Some people fear humiliation more than hell itself and are choosing hell over humility—this is where Pharaoh ended, and only understanding God's compassion can entice such people back. unit #32
  15. You fear humiliation in repentance because you project onto God the cruelty you've shown others, but God is not like that—he does not exploit your lowness or rub your failures in your face. unit #35
  16. The moment you adopt genuine, soul-deep humility before God, he instantly shifts from opposing you to being for you—God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble. unit #36
  17. Pharaoh couldn't repent because his own cruelty to the weak made him fear becoming weak himself, but this fear was misplaced because God is not like us. unit #40
  18. Repentance is ultimately a binary choice between life and death, humility and pride, becoming ashes or receiving healing. unit #43
  19. Sin always harms others through self-exaltation; Christians should repent from love for those they hurt, but if love is insufficient, the fear of God as avenger should motivate them—and they must repent urgently before time runs out. unit #45
  20. Fearing humiliation more than hell is delusional nonsense—God is kind and compassionate and will bless those who humble themselves before him. unit #46
  21. The end of genuine repentance is not sackcloth and ashes but feasting, blessing, and joy—the period of lowness is temporary, the restoration is permanent. unit #48
  22. What matters for assurance is not the exact moment of conversion but being able to identify a time when you were utterly undone and recognized you have nothing good apart from Christ. unit #50
  23. Do not trust in your repentance to justify you—even your tears of repentance need to be washed in Christ's blood; only Christ's actual righteousness, not your repentance, can save you. unit #51
  24. God will not exploit your humility, will not extend your suffering beyond necessity, and will even give those you've hurt the grace to forgive you. unit #52
  25. Genuine repentance requires concrete action that may cost you greatly (as it would have for Pharaoh), but focusing on the cost rather than the joy of restoration is deadly—whatever the cost, it's small compared to the consequences of unrepentance. unit #53
  26. Only when you recognize that Christ's blood is on your hands through your sin will the blood of Christ be applied to your heart for salvation. unit #59
  27. Christ took your sins and the wrath they deserved so you could die to sin and rise to new life—therefore embrace the humiliation of true repentance, knowing God is eager to restore you despite how much you've sinned against him. unit #60
Quotations· 5
"You act like mortals in all that you fear and like immortals in all that you desire." — Seneca (unit #16)
"the expulsive power of a new affection" — Thomas Chalmers (unit #17)
"even our tears of repentance must be washed with the blood of Christ" — old puritan prayer (unit #51)
"Were you there when they crucified my Lord? The old Negro spiritual asks. And we must answer, yes, we were there. Not as spectators only, but as participants. Guilty participants. Plotting, scheming, betraying, denying, and handing him over to be crucified. We may try to wash our hands of responsibility like Pilate, but our attempt will be futile. Before we can begin to see the Cross as something done for us, leading us to faith and worship. We have to see it as something done by us, leading us to repentance. Only the man or woman who is prepared to own his share in the guilt of the cross may claim his share in its grace." — CJ Mahaney (unit #58)
"sacrifices, sacrifices. I will not speak of sacrifices... everything I did, everything I did was worth, was far more than worth what I got." — David Livingston (unit #61)
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Full transcript

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0 · Oswald frames the sermon topic as repentance through the lens of Pharaoh's story in Exodus, positioning this message as a continuation of a previous sermon on false repentance and establishing pastoral rather than punitive motivation for the series

Welcome to the Providence Podcast. My name is Chris Oswald. I'm the senior pastor at Providence Community Church. We've been dealing with the issue of repentance at our church. No, not because anyone has, you know, needed to especially repent in any kind of particular or public way, but because we are concluding the part of the book of Exodus that deals with Pharaoh and Pharaoh's story has much to tell us about the doctrine and the ideas behind repentance. And so I thought we would get into that a little bit further in this particular podcast. Now, I would advise you to listen to the message that should appear right beneath this in whatever podcast player you are using. I think that message is called Pharaoh and false repentance or something like that. I would encourage you to listen to that. You don't have to listen to it first, but I think that after we get done with this one, you may need a little bit more information that that particular podcast provides today in dealing with the issue of repentance and specifically the issue of Pharaoh's lack of repentance or his false repentance.

1 · Introduces the sermon's controlling concept—the narcissism of sin—by grounding it directly in God's accusation against Pharaoh in Exodus 9:17, where God identifies Pharaoh's refusal to release Israel as self-exaltation

I want to talk about the narcissism of sin. The narcissism of sin. And I get that idea from what God says through Moses to Pharaoh in Exodus, chapter 9, verse 17. The verse is simply this. You speaking to Pharaoh are still exalting yourself against my people and will not let them go. You are still exalting yourself against my people and will not let them go.

2 · Establishes the doctrinal foundation that pride is the common root beneath diverse manifestations of sin, then applies this specifically to repentance by distinguishing false repentance (rooted in false humility) from true repentance (rooted in genuine humility)

Now, we all know that pride is the root of many sins. So that if you were to place many sinners in a room, you could find extreme diversity in all of their particular sins. Some would be liars. Some would be worriers. Some would be prone to harsh words, others to cowardice. Some would have sexual sins or other kinds of addictions. You could put all those people in a room and they'd have all these different stories and all these different consequences related to their particular sins. But then if you spent enough time with them and you really were able to drill down to the root of the situation, you would almost always find pride. This is what we see in this text. You are still exalting yourself against my people. So I think the big takeaway from one of the big takeaways that we didn't really discuss in yesterday's message about Pharaoh and false repentance is that false repentance is almost fundamentally, almost always fundamentally rooted in false humility. False repentance is rooted in false humility, while true repentance is rooted in true Humility.

3 · Provides detailed word study of the Hebrew term "mistolel" (to pile up/elevate) used in Exodus 9:17, tracing its usage across scripture (Job, Jeremiah, Proverbs, Psalms) to show how Pharaoh's pride is depicted as a construction project—a deliberate building up of self over others

And what we see in the text is that one of the key sources of Pharaoh's false repentance is that even though he appears humble later on in the passage, he has still not actually become truly humble. His humility is a false humility. He was in reality still exalting himself. So when Moses wrote this account, he had to choose a Hebrew word to describe Pharaoh's pride. And I think this word exalting is an interesting choice. The Holy Spirit inspired Moses in his writing of the book of Exodus to use the Hebrew word mistolel, which means to pile up or elevate. You know, the word is not commonly used to describe an attitude. It's actually kind of more of a construction word, if that makes sense. In the Book of Job, this word is used to describe siege works. And if you don't know what that is, the idea is that an invading army wishing to conquer a particular kingdom would build a large. It would take weeks, if not months. They would build a large amount of dirt, like a big dirt ramp up against the wall of their enemy so that they could get over the wall and get over the wall en masse. Not just a few people who could be easily killed, but thousands of people could run up this ramp and scale over the wall. But the word for exalt is used elsewhere in a construction sense and is translated often as highways, which again is just this idea of mounded up dirt, an elevated road. Just Jeremiah 50 uses this same word to talk about a pile of grain. You see what I'm getting at? The word is really typically something about heaping up, about raising up, raising up a highway, raising up a pile of grain, raising up siege works, and so on and so forth. It is used attitudinally a little bit in the Old Testament. For instance, in Proverbs 4. 8, we are told to elevate wisdom to her rightful place. Elevate wisdom to a rightful place. Proverbs 4. 8. Do not forsake her wisdom. She will keep you. Love her and she will guard you. The beginning of wisdom is this. Get wisdom and whatever you get, get insight. Prize her highly and she will exalt you. She will honor you if you embrace her. And the word prize there, if I'm not mistaken, is actually the word that is used for Pharaoh and himself in Exodus chapter nine. So he's building himself up, he's prizing himself, he's putting himself first. There's another verse, Psalm 68. 4. Sing to God, sing praises to his name, Lift up a song to him who rides through the desert, his name is the Lord, exalt before him. And our word appears here as lift, lift up a song. Build up a song is the idea, which is, if you're into music, it's a really great way of talking about the development and progression of a song. It's a lifting up, it's a building of the song, one melody upon another, upon a harmony and instruments, and so on and so forth. So that's the idea of the word, that Pharaoh is building himself up. He's lifting himself up over the people.

4 · Explains the theological logic behind God's statement to Pharaoh—why God doesn't explicitly say "against me and my people" but only "against my people

Note that God doesn't say. God doesn't say, you are exalting yourself against me and my people. He doesn't say, you're exalting yourself against me and my people, because he doesn't need to say it that way. It's completely understood by this point that God is for these people to such a degree that anything done to them is done to him. Now, this is not an unfamiliar mindset even for us in the modern Western world. If someone were to hurt one of your children, it would be as if they were hurting you. But in the Eastern mindset in particular, which includes the Hebrews, there is a collective way of seeing things. And if you do something to my family, you're doing it to me. Which you know is a. Is a pattern we see throughout Scripture, and an important pattern. Listen to Matthew 25:31. When the son of man comes in his glory and all the angels with him, then he will sit on his glorious throne. Before him will be gathered all the nations, and he will separate people one from another, as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. And he will place the sheep on his right, but the goats on his left. Then the king will say to those on his right, come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you before the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food. I was thirsty and you gave me drink. I was a stranger and you welcomed me. I was naked and you clothed me. I was sick and you visited me. I was in prison and you came to me. Then the righteous will answer him, saying, lord, when did we see you hungry, or feed you or thirsty and give you drink? When did we see you a stranger, and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? And when did we see you sick, or in prison and visit you? And the king will answer, truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of my brothers, you did it unto me.

5 · Pauses the main argument to note an interesting exegetical detail—Jesus's unusually direct self-designation as "the King" in Matthew 25—acknowledging this is a tangent but expressing pastoral delight in the observation

Now there's a couple interesting Things in this passage. One's kind of a little bit of a side trail, but just bear with me. It's really interesting here that Jesus just transparently calls himself the King. I'm actually not aware of another place where he so openly declares this. I might be missing one. I can't think of any. There are plenty of places where he infers that he's the king every time he talks about his kingdom, obviously. But I don't remember another time where he just openly calls himself the king, which is kind of cool.

Where this fits

Recent preaching context

The three sermons immediately preceding this one in the preaching schedule.

Jul 2, 2024
The New Testament canon we possess today was not the product of arbitrary late decisions by church councils but was recognized as Scripture from the time of composition, widely circulated and cited by first-century church fathers, and only formally ratified in the fourth century to acknowledge what had already been the consistent belief and practice of the orthodox church.
Jul 9, 2024
God sends infertility and bodily limitations not merely to be endured but to be rejoiced in, that through them we would learn spiritual antifragility, keep our motives for childbearing kingdom-oriented, and manifest God's power in our weakness.
Jul 21, 2024
True repentance, as opposed to Pharaoh's false repentance, requires immediate and complete obedience born of faith in God's goodness and sufficiency to sustain us through whatever lifestyle changes that obedience demands.
Exodus 7-14
July 22 · This sermon
The Narcissism of Sin
True repentance from sin requires recognizing that all sin is narcissistic self-exaltation that harms others, and it demands genuine humility before God, who stands as the avenger of those we've hurt but who, unlike us, responds to our brokenness not with cruelty but with compassionate restoration.
Take it further

Discuss · apply · pray

Couples · three questions over coffee

When Sin Hurts the People We Love

  1. Where did the sermon's teaching about sin being narcissistic self-exaltation land most personally for you—what specific area of your own heart did it expose?
  2. Can you think of a pattern in our marriage where one of us has been exalting ourselves at the other's expense, even in small ways—and what would it look like for us to repent together from love for one another rather than fear alone?
  3. How can I pray for you this week as you consider what true humility might cost you in a particular area—and will you pray the same for me?
Draft · pending review
Small-group discussion

6 questions for your group this week

  1. What does the sermon mean when it claims that 'all sin is fundamentally self-exaltation'? How does this differ from the ways we typically think about sin in our own lives?
    → Can you think of a specific sin—even one that seems private or personal—and trace how it exalts self over someone else's good?
  2. The sermon argues that sin always has victims—people who are hurt by our self-exaltation. Why do you think many of us resist recognizing the connection between our sin and its effect on others?
    Matthew 25:31-40
    → Who are the people in your life most affected by the habitual sins you struggle with?
  3. According to the sermon, what is the difference between false repentance rooted in false humility and true repentance rooted in true humility? What makes one false and the other genuine?
    → When you've repented in the past, which kind has it been? How could you tell?
  4. The sermon suggests that love for those we've hurt is a more powerful motivator for repentance than fear alone. Why would recognizing how our sin damages the people we're called to love compel us toward repentance more effectively than fear of punishment?
    1 John 3:14
    → Is there a sin in your life right now where you need to let love—rather than fear—draw you toward change?
  5. The sermon identifies a particular spiritual danger: fearing humiliation more than hell itself, choosing pride over the vulnerability of true repentance. What does it look like when a Christian is trapped in this fear, and what would it take to break free from it?
    Amos 5:21-24
    → What would you have to risk or lose if you embraced genuine humility before God right now?
  6. The sermon promises that the moment you genuinely humble yourself before God, he shifts from opposing you to being for you. How does understanding God's character—that he is kind and will not exploit your lowness—change the way you approach repentance?
    Isaiah 55:6-7
    → If you truly believed God would not punish you beyond what's necessary, and would even work to restore those you've hurt, how would your response to conviction differ this week?
Draft · pending review
Daily readings · Monday–Friday

5-day reading plan

This week we trace how sin's narcissism—self-exaltation at others' expense—calls us to true repentance rooted in humility, fear of the Lord's justice, and the hope of restoration through Christ's blood.

Monday Matthew 25:31-40

Christ's own measure of judgment is whether we saw Him in the hungry, thirsty, stranger, naked, and imprisoned—and whether we moved to meet their need or passed by. Every sin that hoards, ignores, or exploits another person is a refusal to recognize Christ in them; we exalt our comfort over their dignity. The gospel confronts us: sin is never truly private, for in sinning against the vulnerable, we sin against Christ Himself.

Tuesday Amos 5:21-24

God despises the worship of those who oppress the poor and crush the needy—their festivals and solemn assemblies are abominations to Him. No amount of musical fervor or religious ritual can substitute for justice and righteousness toward others. We deceive ourselves if we imagine we can praise God while simultaneously exalting ourselves at another's expense; such worship is mockery in His ears.

Wednesday Isaiah 55:6-7

The Lord calls us to seek Him and return to Him, forsaking our own thoughts and ways for His. This return is not mere intellectual assent but a complete reorientation—we must abandon the world we've constructed where our desires received special preference and descend into true humility. The mercy promised here comes not to those who stay elevated in their pride, but to those who abandon the narcissistic throne they've built and return to God with nothing to offer but their willingness to obey.

Thursday 1 John 3:14

We know we have passed from death to life because we love the brothers and sisters in our fellowship. This love is not sentimentality but the mark of spiritual life itself; its absence signals we remain in death. When we grasp that our sin wounds those we're called to love, the indwelling love of Christ becomes the supreme motivator to forsake that sin—not fear of punishment, but the ache of knowing we've harmed those precious to us and to Him.

Friday Malachi 4:1-3

For those who fear God's name, the sun of righteousness will rise with healing in its wings—they will go out and leap like calves released from the stall, trampling the wicked like ashes. Repentance is not a perpetual descent into self-condemnation; it is the gateway to restoration and feasting. The humiliation of true repentance is brief; what awaits on the other side is the joy of being fully known and fully loved, healed and whole, dancing in the freedom Christ purchased for us through His blood.

Draft · pending review
Pray together this week

Prayer for True Humility and Repentance

Father, we come before you in awe of your character—you are the God who stands with the fatherless, who hears the cry of the oppressed, and who will avenge those we have hurt through our self-exaltation (Psalm 68:5; Isaiah 19:20). We confess that we have often minimized the narcissism of our sin, treating it as private failure rather than recognizing how our self-preference wounds those we are called to love. We have delayed repentance not out of weakness but out of pride—fearing the humiliation of true repentance more than we have feared standing against you. Forgive us for constructing worlds where our desires receive preference while the rules binding everyone else somehow do not bind us (Matthew 25:31-40).

Yet the gospel shows us that Christ has already borne the humiliation we fear. He descended into our shame, took upon himself the wrath our sins deserve, and rose to give us new life—so that we might die to sin and rise with him (Ephesians 2; Romans 6). In him, we see that you are not like the cruelty we have shown others; you do not exploit our lowness or mock our tears, but you give grace to the humble and eagerly restore those who turn (1 Peter 5:5-6; Isaiah 55:6-7).

We ask you to grant us the love of Christ that overcomes what fear alone cannot—that we would see those we've hurt through your eyes and be compelled by gratitude for your mercy to descend from the elevated positions we've built. Give us courage to embrace the humiliation of genuine repentance, knowing it is temporary and that your restoration is permanent (Isaiah 55:10-13; Malachi 4:1-3). Strengthen us to take concrete action, whatever the cost, rather than remain in the delusion that our private sins harm no one. And as we repent, wash even our tears in the blood of Christ, for only his righteousness—not our repentance—can justify us before you (Hebrews 12:14-17).

We commit ourselves to the binary choice before us: life through humility, or death through pride. We choose life. We trust you, O God, and we praise you for your kindness toward those who humble themselves.

Draft · pending review
Sunday-evening family table

When My Sin Hurts Someone I Love

For the parent

This prompt invites your family to see sin not as a private matter between them and God, but as something that wounds real people they're called to love. Listen for moments when kids recognize how their choices affect others—that's where repentance begins.

Pastor Chris talked about how all sin is really about putting ourselves first—like we're saying our desires matter more than the people around us. Can you think of a time when you did something selfish that actually hurt someone in our family? What was it, and what did that person lose because you chose yourself?
works for ages 8+
Draft · pending review
Memory verse this week

Amos 5:21-24

I hate, I despise your feasts, and I take no pleasure in your solemn assemblies. Even though you offer me your burnt offerings and grain offerings, I will not accept them; and the peace offerings of your fattened animals, I will not look upon them. But let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream.

Why this verse: This verse crystallizes the sermon's central claim: that God refuses worship from those who persist in hurting others through sin, no matter how fervent their religious devotion. It anchors the demand for genuine repentance rooted in love for those we've wronged, not mere ritual or false humility.

Draft · pending review
Where this was preached

About the church

Providence Community Church
Lenexa, KS
Sundays · 10:00 AM
About us · What we believe
Plan a visit →
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# Providence Community Church

A church preaching expository sermons through the books of the Bible.

## Sermons
- [How We Got the Bible (2024-07-02)](/ProvidenceLenexa/sermons/2024/07/how-we-got-the-bible)
- [Infertility and the Glory of God (2024-07-09)](/ProvidenceLenexa/sermons/2024/07/infertility-and-the-glory-of-god)
- [Pharaoh & the Problem of False Repentance (Exodus 7-14, 2024-07-21)](/ProvidenceLenexa/sermons/2024/07/pharaoh-the-problem-of-false-repentance)
- [The Narcissism of Sin (2024-07-22)](/ProvidenceLenexa/sermons/2024/07/the-narcissism-of-sin)

## About
- [About the church](/about)
- [Plan a visit](/visit)

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