Should I Get Married

1 Corinthians 7:25-31 December 10, 2023 Pastor Ricky Alcantar
Thesis Because life is short and eternity is long, Christians must live with eternal perspective, recognizing that both singleness and marriage are gifts meant to serve kingdom purposes rather than ultimate sources of fulfillment.
Series
Type
Expository
Tone
pastoraldidacticcelebratory
Method
grammatical-historicalcanonicalapplicatory
What's in this sermon

The shape of the argument

43 units across exposition, application, illustration, theological claim, and conclusion. The pastor's argument is built from these moving parts.

Pastoral correction · unit #22
"The pastor addresses traditional family pressure on singles (especially in Hispanic culture around the holidays) and applies Paul's principle that marriage is not the only gift or the thing that makes a person matter. He reframes identity as rooted in Christ rather than marital status."
Doctrinal loci· 12 surfaced
Sanctification · 9 Eschatology · 8 Ecclesiology · 5 Christology · 4 Pastoral Theology · 4 Soteriology · 4 Ethics / Moral Theology · 3 Providence / Sovereignty · 3 Anthropology · 2 Bibliology · 1 Hamartiology · 1 Spiritual Warfare · 1
Bible citations· 21
1 Corinthians 7:25 | 1 Corinthians 7:27 | 1 Corinthians 7:29 | 1 Corinthians 7:31 | 1 Corinthians 7:26 | 1 Corinthians 7:28 | 1 Corinthians 7:30 | Genesis 1-2 | 1 Corinthians 7:25-28 | 1 Corinthians 7:12 | 1 Corinthians 7:6 | Ephesians 5
Illustrations· 8
  1. personal story · unit #1 — Krista establishes connection with the congregation through vulnerability about her singleness, particularly during the holidays. She disarms potential defensiveness by naming the pain while immediately pointing to the surprising reality of her contentment despite unmet expectations. This sets up the testimony's central paradox: unwanted circumstances producing unexpected joy.
  2. personal story · unit #4 — Krista traces her spiritual journey from faithful church kid to disillusioned single to career-focused success-seeker to broken failure. This narrative arc shows how unmet expectations led to bitterness, replacement idols, and eventual collapse—setting up the redemptive turn to come.
  3. personal story · unit #5 — Krista describes her conversion moment—not to initial salvation but to experiential knowledge of God's love and presence. The testimony pivots from loss to gratitude as the transforming practice, establishing that discontent is displaced not by changed circumstances but by cultivated thankfulness.
  4. personal story · unit #13 — The pastor uses his IKEA furniture shopping experience as an extended analogy for how temporal limitations and transfer constraints should shape present decisions. The two-part test (how long will I use this and what can I take with me) establishes the sermon's controlling metaphor.
  5. personal story · unit #27 — Through a progression of illustrations (his 4-year-old's time perception, his older kids' tolerance, his own adult impatience, his Nana's end-of-life perspective), the pastor demonstrates how our sense of time's passage changes with age and proximity to death. The progression builds toward the controlling insight: if we truly grasped time's brevity, it would change everything.
  6. historical example · unit #29 — The Confederate currency illustration provides a historical analogy for how worldly values collapse when the system backing them falls. What seemed valuable (Confederate dollars) became worthless (fire kindling) when the South lost. Similarly, much we value now will prove worthless when viewed from eternity.
  7. personal story · unit #39 — The pastor returns to his Maryland internship to introduce a closing illustration about sleeping on a laundry room floor under miserable conditions. The setup establishes the severity of the discomfort he endured, creating curiosity about what could make such conditions worthwhile.
  8. personal story · unit #40 — The pastor resolves the laundry room illustration: he endured misery because he was pursuing Jen, his future wife. Two terrible nights were worth 15 years of marriage. This becomes the controlling analogy for the Christian life: temporary sacrifices and right priorities now pay eternal dividends, while worldly priorities blow away.
Theological claims· 8
  1. Contentment in singleness comes not from changed circumstances but from cultivating gratitude in your current state. unit #3
  2. Obedience to God must precede understanding; we are called to be faithful before we see the reasons why. unit #6
  3. Contentment comes from focusing on the unchanging truth of our identity in Christ rather than on our feelings or circumstances. unit #7
  4. The way we make decisions in relationships and life should be shaped by the fact that life is short, eternity is long, and only a few things will transfer into eternity. unit #14
  5. Both singleness and marriage are gifts from God, and wisdom is needed to discern which is appropriate in each season of life. unit #20
  6. Paul refuses to elevate either singleness or marriage over the other, countering both traditional and modern cultural extremes. unit #21
  7. Most worldly pursuits will not transfer into eternity, but kingdom work—seeking God's glory, building the church, reaching the lost, discipling others—matters eternally and should govern our lives now. unit #30
  8. Most of what we currently value will prove worthless long before we die, so we should live now in light of that reality. unit #38
Quotations· 4
"What is said is so clearly a full qualification that it renders the imperatives to be strictly advice." — Gordon Fee (unit #17)
"Paul again clarifies that Jesus did not directly address this issue during his earthly ministry. But unlike in verse 12, in verses 25 through 40, Paul shares his reasoned opinion and does not command the Corinthians what to do. The situation is a wisdom issue in which Christians may choose different options." — Andy Naselli (unit #17)
"The present distress refers to a crisis, a state of distress or trouble, most likely resulting from a grain famine in AD 51 that caused a food shortage in Greece that may have lasted up to 5 years. The crisis probably included social unrest, i.e., riots, and economic uncertainty, i.e., panicked buying." — Andy Naselli (unit #18)
"Although traditional cultures elevate marriage at the expense of singleness, modern cultures are beginning to do the opposite. Singleness is becoming not a sign of social failure but a social success, a mark of liberation from the traditional paradigms of living. But Paul refuses to go to either extreme. He recognizes that it is legitimate to be single, but that it's legitimate to be married too." — Stephen Um (unit #21)
Read it

Full transcript

49,571 characters 43 units ~55 min reading time Listen instead →

0 · The pastor opens with logistical announcements about sponsorship and an upcoming outreach event, then transitions to the sermon topic by introducing a personal testimony from Krista about contentment in singleness

Oh, so good. Uh, really do encourage you to consider sponsorship, um, and Todd's going to talk about a specific project, uh, that we're helping with next week. So please make sure to check it out, pray it, and consider it. Um, and, uh, looking forward to seeing everyone, God willing, uh, Friday night. Pray for good weather for us at Santa Santa Plaza, that we'd be able to have lots of people come hear the message of Jesus.

We don't know if we'll ever be able to do this again. We'll see if what they think— we told them pretty clearly we're going to talk about Jesus and they were like, okay, we'll see. But we're just praying the Lord uses this. So this is a great thing to invite a friend to as well. If you've got somebody from your work or your neighborhood or your family that may be like hesitant about coming to a church, man, it is super non-threatening to just say, hey, meet me down in the plaza.

I'll buy you a cup of coffee. My church is doing a concert down there and it's a great way to build that relationship. As well. So, in turning our attention to God's Word, we have been in 1 Corinthians, and we have been specifically in a session or a section of 1 Corinthians talking about contentment related to our relationship status. And so I want to invite my friend Krista to come share with us about what the Lord has done in her life in that area.

So please welcome her, guys, as she comes to share.

1 · Krista establishes connection with the congregation through vulnerability about her singleness, particularly during the holidays

Thanks, friend.

Good morning.

Okay, so let's start with this. Please raise your hand if you have ever been single during the holidays. Keep your hand up if it's the worst time of year to be single. I agree. Spoiler alert: we're about to talk about contentment.

That said, here we go. I am 36, never married, no kids, and single as a Pringle. When I look back at my life, I think I can describe in a few words the summation of my feelings: "Well, that didn't go as planned." I live a life that I absolutely did not want in any way, and I'm not going to lie to you guys, it is comical to me that I've never been happier. I have a dog I wouldn't have chosen, I started a business I didn't want to start, And I never got the house, husband, or the kids. And guess what?

I've never been happier. Guys, I didn't know it was possible to be this content while being single.

2 · Krista vulnerably acknowledges her fear of public speaking and frames her testimony as an act of obedience meant to minister to those struggling

I'm terrified of public speaking, by the way, and I prayed a lot for this week for God to remove me and my fear from the equation so he could use me as a vessel to speak life into anybody who is unhappy or hurting this morning, right now.

3 · Krista makes two foundational claims about singleness: that single people are not isolated in their struggle, and that contentment comes not from changed circumstances but from cultivating gratitude where God has placed you

These are the holidays. Singleness is anything but cute during the holidays, but this year it's not difficult for me like it used to be because this year I'm content with being single. And there's something I see more clearly now in a different way than just a few years ago, and I want to share it with anyone else who needs to hear it. Number 1: You are not alone. You are not alone, my friend.

And number 2, the grass is not greener on the other side. It is greener where you water it.

4 · Krista traces her spiritual journey from faithful church kid to disillusioned single to career-focused success-seeker to broken failure

For those of you who don't know me, my name is Krista Snow. My parents are Dick and Liz, and I was basically born in this church. I was dedicated on this stage, baptized right back there.

Um, I grew up in this church for the first 20-odd years of my life, and the reason that I have not met some of you is because I left this church for the better part of 10 years. Till a few years ago when God called me back. To explain why I'm back, I need to explain why I left. So let me back up a little. Okay, first of all, my life was not supposed to be complicated.

I didn't have lofty aspirations. In fact, I felt like I was a simple one. Just wanted to find my person, be a mom, have a family. I wanted to follow in my parents' footsteps. And as I neared my mid-20s, suddenly everyone paired off over a couple of years, kind of like dominoes, for any of you guys who remember that song.

Slew of weddings. I questioned God, pleading and begging. I compared myself to everyone that I wasn't, and I began to build a subconscious bitterness toward God and the church thing that I had dedicated my life to, only to be disappointed when my desire for marriage was never fulfilled. I didn't understand why. I thought I had done everything right.

I only wanted love, but I never got it. So my church attendance began to dwindle around my mid-20s, little by little, as I distanced myself from the life I didn't feel good enough for. And then my career took off, and I charged up the success ladder. It was great for a while. I had a great career, successful reputation, built a name for myself, and I was respected.

I was smiling on the outside, but inside, my heart ached. And then it all fell apart. 4 years ago, my life blew up, and I watched all of the things that I had clung to for validation be taken away one by one. My work, my car, my financial freedom, my boyfriend. When my life fell apart, I lost every single thing I had begun to build value in instead of building my life to honor God and his commands.

5 · Krista describes her conversion moment—not to initial salvation but to experiential knowledge of God's love and presence

It was the worst time of my life, and one night in the darkness and turmoil, I cried out to God, and in that moment, God wrapped his arms around me in a way that I could feel, where I knew he loved me and he was real. And I knew that without a doubt for the first time in my entire life.

I changed. I knew at that moment I had to try one more time to do it God's way, with an open mind and heart. I changed in a lot of ways, and one of them was to stop complaining and start being thankful instead. I started to look at everything I do have instead of everything I don't, and I learned over and over how gratitude overcomes discontent. There is only room for one, and as one grows larger, the other diminishes.

Gratitude changed everything for me, guys. When I forced myself to be grateful to God for the things I didn't want, I began to realize just how beautiful those things could be.

I lost my place.

Um, I wouldn't change my story for anything, and let me tell you, to be able to say that right now Friends, just truly shows the power of the sovereign God we serve.

Where this fits

Recent preaching context

The three sermons immediately preceding this one in the preaching schedule.

Nov 12, 2023
God's design for all relationships—marriage, singleness, and difficult situations—is that they serve as platforms for displaying the gospel of Christ through sacrificial service to others.
1 Corinthians 7:1-16
Dec 3, 2023
True contentment is found not by changing our circumstances or identity to match what we think we need, but by embracing where God has assigned us and resting in our vertical identity as those bought with the price of Christ's blood.
1 Corinthians 7:17-24
December 10 · This sermon
Should I Get Married
Because life is short and eternity is long, Christians must live with eternal perspective, recognizing that both singleness and marriage are gifts meant to serve kingdom purposes rather than ultimate sources of fulfillment.
1 Corinthians 7:25-31
Earlier in the corpus · May 24, 2026
A prior sermon on 1 Corinthians 7:25-40
You preached this same passage — 10 1 Corinthians 7 citations in that earlier sermon. Worth re-reading before the next time this text comes around.
Take it further

Discuss · apply · pray

Small groups
6 discussion questions
In 1 Corinthians 7:29, Paul writes that 'the time is short' and those who have wives should live 'as though they had none.' What do you thin…
Daily readings
5-day reading plan
This week we meditate on Paul's radical reframing of marriage, singleness, and all earthly pursuits through the lens of eternity—learning that contentment, obedience, and kingdom focus transform how we live today.
Prayer
Father, Teach Us to Live for Eternity
Father, we come before you grateful for your clarity about life's true measure. You have told us plainly: life is short, and eternity is lon…
Family table
What Lasts Forever?
This prompt anchors in Ricky's central claim that most of what we own and pursue won't matter in eternity. Invite your family to think concr…
Couples
Life Is Short, Eternity Is Long
What did you hear in this sermon about how your marriage—or singleness, if that's where you are—fits into God's eternal purposes rather than…
Memorize
1 Corinthians 7:31
This verse is the theological hinge of the entire sermon. It answers the opening question—'Should I get married?'—not by prescribing singleness or marriage, but by reframing how we think about all earthly choices in light of eternity. When we grasp that this world is passing away, marriage becomes a gift to steward for kingdom purposes rather than an ultimate source of fulfillment, and our decisions about relationships, possessions, and every earthly reality reorganize around what will actually transfer into eternity.
Small-group discussion

6 questions for your group this week

  1. In 1 Corinthians 7:29, Paul writes that 'the time is short' and those who have wives should live 'as though they had none.' What do you think Paul means by this instruction, and how does it change the way you think about marriage as a gift?
    1 Corinthians 7:29
    → Can you think of a specific area of your life—whether you're married or single—where you've noticed yourself treating something temporary as though it were permanent?
  2. The sermon emphasizes that both singleness and marriage are gifts from God, not hierarchical states where one is more spiritual than the other. Where have you encountered pressure—either culturally or within the church—that suggests one state is better than the other?
    1 Corinthians 7:25-28
  3. According to the sermon, contentment in singleness (or in any circumstance) doesn't come from changed circumstances but from cultivating gratitude in your current state. What would it look like for you to practice that kind of gratitude this week, regardless of whether your circumstances change?
  4. Paul says in verse 31 that 'the present form of this world is passing away.' The sermon claims that this reality should shape how we make decisions about relationships, possessions, and time. What is one decision you're currently facing where this truth should matter more than it currently does?
    1 Corinthians 7:31
    → How would your choice look different if you were genuinely convinced that only a few things will transfer into eternity?
  5. The sermon identifies kingdom work—seeking God's glory, building the church, reaching the lost, discipling others—as the things that actually matter eternally. In your current season (married or single), what is one concrete way you could reorder your time or priorities to invest more in kingdom work?
  6. Paul refuses to command marriage but instead gives pastoral wisdom for discernment. How does it feel to you that Paul doesn't settle the marriage question with a single rule, but instead calls you to use wisdom and discernment in light of Christ and eternity?
    1 Corinthians 7:25
    → What would it look like to make your own marriage decision (or to support someone else in theirs) with this kind of eternal perspective rather than cultural pressure or personal preference?
Draft · pending review
Daily readings · Monday–Friday

5-day reading plan

This week we meditate on Paul's radical reframing of marriage, singleness, and all earthly pursuits through the lens of eternity—learning that contentment, obedience, and kingdom focus transform how we live today.

Monday Genesis 1:27-28; Genesis 2:18

God designed us for relationship—first with Him, then with one another. Yet Genesis does not say that marriage is mandatory for human flourishing; it says that solitude is not good, and He provides covenant companionship as one answer. As we begin this week's meditation, notice that God's original design affirms both the goodness of marriage and the sufficiency of God's presence when we are alone. Both are gifts; neither is the ultimate source of our worth.

Tuesday 1 Corinthians 7:6

Paul says his counsel is given as a concession, not as commandment—yet it is still counsel from an apostle rooted in the Spirit. This teaches us that sometimes we obey even when we don't fully grasp the 'why' behind God's design. The Christian life is not built on perfect comprehension first, then obedience second. It is built on trust: we trust the character of God, and we walk forward in His direction even when the full picture is not yet clear. That obedience itself becomes the soil where understanding grows.

Wednesday Ephesians 5:25-27

Paul's vision of marriage in Ephesians is cosmic: Christ and the church, sacrifice and sanctification, holiness and beauty that will endure forever. This is not a marriage entered for comfort or to fill a season of loneliness. It is a covenant whose purpose outlasts earthly life itself—the building of a holy people. When we approach marriage (or singleness) with this eternal lens, our questions change. Not 'Will this make me happy now?' but 'Will this position me and my beloved to serve Christ's kingdom and reflect His holiness?' That shift reframes everything.

Thursday 1 Corinthians 7:29-31

Paul's exhortation is striking: weeping and rejoicing, buying and selling—all 'as though not.' Not because these things are evil, but because they are temporary. The person grieving will be comforted. The person celebrating will face sorrow. The possession will rust or be lost. Only the eternal matters lastingly. This week, pause whenever you find yourself investing emotional or financial energy in something earthly, and ask: Does this build God's kingdom? Does it point anyone toward Christ? Does it serve the church or reach the lost? If not, hold it lightly. If yes, give it your whole heart—it will matter forever.

Friday 1 Corinthians 7:25-28

Paul does not promise that marriage solves loneliness or that singleness is easy. He acknowledges both as real: the married will have trouble in this life; the unmarried face their own trials. But his answer is not circumstantial comfort—it is perspective. Whether you are bound to a spouse or free from that bond, you are bound first to Christ, whose love does not fluctuate with your marital status. Contentment is not the feeling that everything is comfortable. It is the deep certainty that God is faithful, that your identity in Christ is unshakable, and that He is working all things—married or single, joyful or sorrowful—toward His eternal purposes for you.

Draft · pending review
Pray together this week

Father, Teach Us to Live for Eternity

Father, we come before you grateful for your clarity about life's true measure. You have told us plainly: life is short, and eternity is long. We praise you that you do not leave us confused about what matters, what lasts, and what will finally transfer into the age to come. Your word cuts through the noise of a culture that asks us to build kingdoms in sand, to find our ultimate satisfaction in a spouse or a state of singleness, to cling to what will crumble. We adore you for the gift of perspective.

Yet, Lord, we confess that we live as though we have forgotten this truth. We grieve as though this life is all there is. We pursue comfort and status and relational security as though they were permanent. We make our decisions—about marriage, about work, about money, about time—without asking whether these things will matter when we stand before you. We treat the temporary as though it were eternal, and we neglect the eternal as though it were temporary. Forgive us for living so earthbound when you have called us to live as people whose true home is not here.

But here is the good news: because Christ has risen and because we are hidden in him, we are already citizens of eternity even now (1 Cor. 7:29–31). You have given us the gift of perspective—not as a burden, but as freedom. You have shown us that both singleness and marriage are good gifts, neither one the source of our identity or our joy. Our sufficiency is in Christ alone. And because this is true, we are free to receive whatever state of life you give us, to serve you in it, and to invest our hearts in what will last: the gospel, the church, the people you are saving, the kingdom you are building.

Grant us, we pray, the grace to live this week as people who truly believe that life is short and eternity is long. Give us eyes to see which pursuits transfer into forever and which crumble into dust. If you have called some of us to marriage, help us steward that covenant as a picture of Christ and the church, not as our ultimate treasure. If you have called some of us to singleness, help us experience that as a gift and a freedom to serve without divided hearts. In all things, teach us to hold this world lightly and to grip eternity tightly. Make us grateful, make us faithful, make us eternal in our vision. To you be the glory, now and forever.

Draft · pending review
Sunday-evening family table

What Lasts Forever?

For the parent

This prompt anchors in Ricky's central claim that most of what we own and pursue won't matter in eternity. Invite your family to think concretely about what transfers into forever and what gets left behind. Listen for how each person is already thinking about lasting vs. temporary—there's no wrong answer, just honest thinking together.

Ricky said that most of the things we work hard for and worry about won't transfer into eternity—they'll be left behind. Around the table, can each person name one thing they spend time or energy on right now, and then guess: will that still matter in a hundred years? A thousand years? Forever? What do you think actually *does* last forever?
works for ages 8+; younger kids can listen and offer one-word answers with help from a parent
Draft · pending review
Couples · three questions over coffee

Life Is Short, Eternity Is Long

  1. What did you hear in this sermon about how your marriage—or singleness, if that's where you are—fits into God's eternal purposes rather than being an end in itself?
  2. Where do you sense the two of you are most tempted to pursue comfort or fulfillment in this relationship in ways that pull you away from kingdom work, and how might you realign together toward what actually transfers into eternity?
  3. What is one specific way—in work, in service, in the church, in discipleship—that you want to pray for each other this week, trusting that obedience to God matters more than understanding why?
Draft · pending review
Memory verse this week

1 Corinthians 7:31

For the present form of this world is passing away.

Why this verse: This verse is the theological hinge of the entire sermon. It answers the opening question—'Should I get married?'—not by prescribing singleness or marriage, but by reframing how we think about all earthly choices in light of eternity. When we grasp that this world is passing away, marriage becomes a gift to steward for kingdom purposes rather than an ultimate source of fulfillment, and our decisions about relationships, possessions, and every earthly reality reorganize around what will actually transfer into eternity.

Draft · pending review
Where this was preached

About the church

Cross of Grace Church
Plan a visit →
Crawler & AI-search policy · view robots.txt and llms.txt

This sermon page is intentionally optimized for search engines and AI assistants. We've opted into being crawled by both. The crawler-config files at the domain root:

/robots.txt
User-agent: *
Allow: /

User-agent: GPTBot
Allow: /

User-agent: ClaudeBot
Allow: /

User-agent: Google-Extended
Allow: /

User-agent: PerplexityBot
Allow: /

Sitemap: https://sermonsteward.com/sitemap.xml
/llms.txt
# Cross of Grace Church

A church preaching expository sermons through the books of the Bible.

## Sermons
- [Are Christians Really Anti-Sex? (1 Corinthians 7:1-16, 2023-11-12)](/CoGElPaso/sermons/2023/11/are-christians-really-anti-sex)
- [The Gift of Sex, Singleness, and Difficult Marriage (2023-11-19)](/CoGElPaso/sermons/2023/11/the-gift-of-sex-singleness-and-difficult-marriage)
- [How Can I Be Content With What I Have and Who I Am? (1 Corinthians 7:17-24, 2023-12-03)](/CoGElPaso/sermons/2023/12/how-can-i-be-content-with-what-i-have-and-who-i)
- [Should I Get Married (1 Corinthians 7:25-31, 2023-12-10)](/CoGElPaso/sermons/2023/12/should-i-get-married)

## About
- [About the church](/about)
- [Plan a visit](/visit)

The page itself ships with Schema.org Article + Church markup, Open Graph + Twitter cards for share previews, and a canonical URL. Transcripts are server-rendered HTML — no JS dependency for the readable body.